We may feel ‘it’ for no reason. Except maybe we’ve numbed ourselves to the pain. We may attempt to repel it, fight it, move around it. We may ignore it or stuff it into our bellies to let out at a ‘better’ time. But Anger is a part of our make up. It is the gateway to evolution.
Anger is a fickle threshold of catastrophe and purpose.
Our anger has harmed so many before, and we hate ourselves for it. We’re so unforgiving to ourselves when it spills out. We’re so cautious, OVER cautious of allowing it to happen too often… if ever again.
We’ve used our anger to tear down others, we’ve misused our anger so many ways we’ve forgotten just how necessary it is to our human development.
Anger lives in us. Others recognize it without words or action, it’s the very trait they fear in us. It’s due to our rage we’ve been cast off, chastised and abandon. Because of all the ways, anger has been demonized we’ve become terrified to reveal our fire because we’ve been banished for it in the past.
It’s the lava that moves in our veins, a part of our natural makeup and yet; we pray it away, cry it away, and breathe it away. When it happens to slip out, ooze from our mouths. We quickly blot it from the corners of our lips and profusely apologize for its existence.
But while we’re trying to maintain a societal standard of acceptability by pretending the fire doesn’t dance within us, all the while our bellies are aching, filled with the burning sensation of all we desire to set free. All we hold inside that needs air to fully live. Our bodies ache for healing. A healing that can only move to form by this authentic release. It whispers its discomfort and scorns our sad attempt to bury what is ours to feel.
All the while we’re piling anger on top of our frustration,
for being forced into the silences,
for being condemned for what we feel,
for looking at a familiar landscape with different eyes.
And we’re mad as hell because we see life differently,
We’re angry because we feel it differently, it “gets us into trouble” and it’s so damn DANGEROUS for us to feel this way.
They don’t know the burden we bear just by being the carrier of the flame.
I need to tell you though, your anger is not broken…
Your instinct to YELL is natural. Your eyes blur and your ears go numb as it bubbles to the surface, no longer gripping at your womb. It travels up, your throat and bursts like lava through a volcano. Your anger was never meant to be contained, and you need to start believing that is okay to feel this way.
What no one ever taught you, was your anger possesses wisdom.
Your fury has form,
It commands presence and shapes new worlds.
Your anger is a gift if you choose to harness its power.
And before you back away, I need to remind you of all the injustices that sparked your frustrations to begin with
All the times you spoke and no one listened,
All the times your femininity has not had a place,
All the times your intuition was blatantly ignored,
All the times your feelings were dismissed because they contained no logic,
All the ways you so desperately sought out boundaries only to be infiltrated by your abusers,
All the people that watched you suffer and left you for dead,
All the people who poured their emotions out for YOU to carry only to be abandon in return,
All the YEARS you suffered silently waiting for ANYONE to lend you a hand to hold in return.
Your heart has been kicked around and it fucking hurts,
and you will not stay silent about it forever.
You’re yelling because of the immeasurability of these grave injustices. You wailing at the mountains edge because of the pain you’ve kept trapped inside and your body can no longer retain the ferociousness you’ve forced into the dark caverns of your mind.
You’re mad and I don’t blame you.
You’re mad because you’re drowning in ‘the flow’ of others, which feels like TORTURE in your body.
You’re outraged at the constant abusive whip of demand when all you really need is a bit of acceptance to pump life back into your lungs.
You’re desperate for permission to FEEL whatever it is you NEED to without persecution.
You’re overwhelmed and it capsizes your temple vessel while someone grabs at your hands and demands you to sign away all of your emotional rights.
Your right to feel ‘too’ deeply.
Your right to point out the reality of inequality.
Your right to pursue the truth.
Your right to journey down YOUR path.
It’s no wonder your anger surfaces at unmanageable times. The emotion comes up for ‘no reason’ but really it’s hidden away thousands painful soul crimes minute by minute. You’re mad, and you deserve a chance to expose your anguish. You deserve a chance to unleash all you’ve held in for the comfort of others.
MAKE them uncomfortable. SHOW them what you’ve been living with. Channel your fire into raw naked passion and light the whole world up like the Fire Goddess you were always meant to be. Let them drop their jaws in stunned silence as you flicker and glow your brilliant truth.
Your fury need not turn to wildfire and burn the village down but channeled successfully into your howling wolf woman, you are free to strip away your mask and reveal the essence of your flawless nature.
You see, Fire Goddess is in complete control of the blaze. She sparks bright and commands her ancestors to circle and revere the enlightenment of her rage. She is center stage, dressed in an alluring red gown drinking the elixir of the wolf spirit while she sings out her soul song and commands the compassion of her tribe. She narrows here eyes and growls at her accusers while she refuses to succumb to the fear of her ferocity. The Fire Goddess has evolved from Cinderella silently scrubbing away the worldly mess of others and becomes the beacon of hope for other women to be just as courageous as she claims her voice and cries out NO MORE.
Your anger is worthy.
Your story is worthy.
Your truth is worthy.
May it be loud, may it be purpose-filled, and may it forge the path ahead so you may never be pressed under the thumb of abuse, ever again.
If people fear the bark of your voice, go on and let them cower, because at least you know, they will listen. They don’t have to know you’ll never bite. And you’re free to walk away from ANYONE who does not respect your flame.
You may shake, you may tremble as the entire Earth quakes in your skin, But you must be courageous enough to continue revealing what you’ve been holding back so long.
Maintain the direction of your fire, as it blazes UP into the sky. Construct the container that gives your story form, hold nothing back… you may be angry but you will do no harm. Fire Goddess calls you to recognize your anger is NOT an attack, but an opportunity to deliver messages and create barriers to safety and security.
And if it takes your anger to set you free, don’t be afraid, for constructive channeled anger is your passion turned right side up.
So go on, release your fears, light the sacred candle of your fire goddess heart and burn bright for all the world to see.